Completely Exonerated!

After months of endless suspicion and accusation, I’m please to say the Mueller Report has completely exonerated me!

Completely….

I can’t tell you how relieved that makes me.

Well, actually I can tell you…and in fact I probably just did.

I guess it’s just one of those weird things you say but don’t really mean.

Like… after months of endless suspicion and accusation, I’m please to say the Muller Report has completely exonerated me!

Anyway, my point is…I’m in the clear.

No more WITCH HUNT!

So I’m glad that’s over.

Because witches are pretty scary.

Especially the green ones with the brooms and weird hats.

And hopefully that “Fixer” fella will stop sending me snap chat messages asking for advice.

How should I know what color tie works best in C Block?

At least, now, I can get back to doing the people’s work.

If I only knew what that was.

I mean who can say what that really is, since there’s so much of it out there.

Where do I even start?

So, I’ll probably take a day or two or a dozen to figure it out.

Could take weeks…maybe months…if not years.

You probably didn’t even know I was caught up in that whole thing.

And to be honest, I’m not even sure, myself.

All I know is I wasn’t mentioned in that synopsis released a couple of weeks back, so I’m assuming that means I’m good to go.

Although I’m not sure where that is exactly, but if I want to go…I’m good.

Of course, I could still get snagged by the Southern District.

Man, I don’t even want to think about that.

What a hassle that would be.

I mean, the parking down there, alone, is enough to make you want to cut a deal.

But finger crossed.

I’m optimistic it’ll all soon be behind me.

I have my hot shot attorney out there, on the job, getting it done on all the news shows…at least when the Yankees are out of town.

He just hasn’t brought it up, yet.

But he will…he promised…I think.

I can never tell.

He’s a little hard to understand when he gets all worked up and bug eyed.

Even if he doesn’t, I have a backup.

I’ve given “The Judge” some shouting points.

“The Judge” never lets me down.

Plus, I’m certain it’s only a matter of time before the Home Runs start flying over that short porch, again.

Yep…complete EXONERATION!

Everyone knows it.

It’s all everyone’s talking about.

NO COLLUSION…NO OBSTRUCTION!

Such a horrible way to treat people.

Exoneration or not, who’s gonna restore my reputation?

Even if I had a reputation…for anything.

Which I don’t, so maybe it’s for the best.

LIES…LIES…LIES…FAKE NEWS!

Keep saying it and pretty soon people will think it’s the truth.

Someone told me that…over and over again....

I forget who.

But I’m pretty sure it’s the truth…maybe…I think.

And who’s investigating the investigators investigating the investigators investigating….

I have no idea…but I’m sure they’ll figure it out…or something.

Good or bad…the people have a right to know.

What do I care?

Put it ALL out there.

I’ve got nothing to hide.

Other than that thing behind my garage.

Besides, I’m sure they won’t even spell my name correctly.

Why would they?   

Nobody ever does.

I mean who spells Brian with a BRY…who…who does that?

Maybe the Russians.

But you didn’t hear that from me.

I’ve got nothing to do with Russia.

I don’t even like Russian Dressing…no matter what that silly report says.

I’m strictly a Gorgonzola guy.

Everyone knows it…everyone’s talking about it.

That, and now there’s something about oranges.

Which are not my thing either.

Too hard to peel.

I prefer the Clementine…plus I like the song….

COMPLETE AND TOTAL EXNOERATION!

You can’t say it enough…apparently….

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