Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Idiomatic of Nothing







Last time...yeah, way back then...I tried to do February a solid by talking up its good points.

Yeah...right?

Then, the next day, February dumped about 6 inches of snow.

And then, as if that weren’t enough, another 3 or so a couple of days later.

So I can only surmise, February likes its bad boy—or girl...who can tell with months—image.

But then it decided to change course, again, and throw a little springtime our way...with a little subfreezing temps mixed in—here and  there...there and here— just to keep us on our toes.

Which I’ve always found to be an odd reaction...but there it is.

A bunch of people walking around on their toes.

Not that I’m complaining.

Well, I mean, yeah...I am complaining...but I’m supposed to say I’m not.

Not sure why.

All in all, I find the toe walking entertaining.

Plus it saves on shoe leather...or rubber.

Which goes hand in hand with my next proclamation.

Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Feeling February











I’ve never been a February fan.

I guess a lot of people feel that way.

February mostly feels like a whole bunch of dreary "without ends".

February mostly feels like waiting in line at the DMV to find out what other line you’re supposed to be standing in.

February mostly feels like sitting through the popcorn and Twizzlers commercials at the multiplex, 20 minutes after the movie was scheduled to begin.  

February mostly feels like waiting for a table at Applebee’s on a Saturday night.

February mostly feels like waiting for your waitress to take your order at Applebee’s on a Saturday night.
February mostly feels like waiting for your food to arrive at Applebee’s on a Saturday night.

February mostly feels like waiting for your table to be cleared at Applebee’s on a Saturday night.

February mostly feels like waiting for your bill at Applebee’s on a Saturday night.

February mostly feels like wondering why you ever went to Applebee’s on a Saturday night...or at all.

But that was before my new positive outlook on all things dreary.

My realization that there’s something good to be found in all things...even dreary things...even Applebee’s.

Wednesday, February 1, 2017

Who’s Bright Idea?







I guess we all saw this coming.

Or should have.

The confusion, the chaos...the heavy handed, tyrannical government intrusion into everything we hold near and dear.

The upheaval of the status quo.

Basic rights, ethics, morality and just plain common sense and decency thrown to the wolves.

Is this the kind of thing we want to see our government involved in?

Really?

Messing with our light bulbs?

What...?

Why the big gasp?

Am I missing something?

Is there something more important than the light bulb outrage going on?

If there is, no one told me about it and I’ve been way too busy trying to get to the bottom of this lighting issue to watch the news or read a newspaper....

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

Click Baiting Bathos







I'm moving at a snail’s pace, again...already...here in the "New Year".

Which, for some reason, spell check demands I capitalize, as if "New Year" were a proper name or something.

Spellcheck...so annoying.

So distracting....

But, I like to mess with it once in awhile and add words to the dictionary that I porposley misspell.

You gotta do these things from time to time...or else the AI wins.

That’s right AI, which doesn’t stand for Arnie Ingersoll, my old grade school nemesis.

That’s right Arnie...I’m talking about you.

Ingersoll...!

Sorry, my impulse control’s acting up again.

Thursday, January 19, 2017

Take “It” as “It” Comes









Sorry for falling off the blog map...again.

I’ve been involved with some big deal “grown up” issues the last couple of weeks so, of course, I’ve been curled in a ball, with a blanket over my head, hiding in the basement.

Where I’d still be if I hadn’t dropped that box of frozen ravioli, which alerted my neighbor who told me to go home and curl up in my own basement...and get over it.

People are always telling me to get over it.

“Relax...just take it as it comes.”

Really...they are.

Oh, wait...someone just shouted it through my window.

So weird, this neighborhood.

But I suppose it’s good advice, nonetheless, no matter what window it comes through.

Problem is: I’m not very good at taking other people’s advice, let alone taking “it” as “it” comes”.

Saturday, January 7, 2017

FREE Time Almost NO time....


1/8/2016

The promotion for a free download of The Little Red Christmas ball has ended. Thanks to all who took advantage of the opportunity and now have your own copy snuggled onto your personal reading device of choice. I hope you enjoyed The Little Red Christmas Ball's story and pick up a copy of the paperback to hold on...shine bright and share with your family for years to come....

********************************************





Just a few hours left to download your FREE digital version of The Little Red Christmas Ball before we wrap the little guy up and pack him away until next year ! 

If you've already taken advantage of this great, FREE E-book offer, I hope you enjoyed The Little Red Christmas Ball's story and pick up a copy of the paperback to hold on...shine bright and share with your family for years to come....

Right now we're sitting on lucky #13 on the Top 100 FREE e-book, yada yada yada...Christmas books, so let's see if we can upend that Dickens fellow, who's sitting so smugly at #2.

I mean, come on Charlie...not even #1? After all these years!











And don't forget

“The Kingdom of Keys”


also available at Amazon



















Wednesday, January 4, 2017

A Better New Year – Disagree to Agree









Here we are...

A new day, a new week a new year...all rolled into one.

I guess.

Kind of like a great big meatball.

Except with artificial units of time rather than meat.

Which, to be honest, as a matter of course, you probably want to avoid any hint of artificiality in most things, especially meat.

So now, everyone feels as if they get a great big re-do...a fresh start.

You know, because of all the new artificial units of time lying ahead.

Which has nothing to do with meatballs, except they too are better if fresh.

Yeah...not much has changed.

Pointless silliness is still pointless silliness no matter what day, week or year it is.

For instance, I’m going to try, in this new artificial unit of time, avoiding people that disagree with me.

Makes sense right?