The Freelance Retort: Tomorrow

When I was a kid, “tomorrow” was a very vague and flexible concept.

Tomorrow was when I would mow the lawn, write that English paper, throw away all those empty cartons of left over Chinese food that had accumulated under my bed throughout the months of January and February…okay, and sometimes March...and April.

There was always tomorrow.

I mean not that there isn’t any more. Hopefully, at the tender age of 57, there’re lots of tomorrows ahead for this Buckeroo…hopefully.

But let’s face it, I’m at the age where the yesterdays are beginning to outnumber the tomorrows.

Right?

Just a bit….

Right?

Maybe….

It’s always been hard to argue with yesterday.

That book’s already been written…and yeah, maybe you did look a bit like the great unwashed and badly mustachioed during your college days; but you were working it.

But there's no running away from those shirts with collars the size of Philadelphia that you wore in your mid 20’s.

And need I mention that squirrelly little pony tail you developed when you turned 40....

But not so tomorrow; tomorrow’s an untold story full of fresh pages, rife with endless possibilities.

Once, tomorrow was when you’d worry about the results of all the errant behaviors you engaged in throughout your “not now” youth.

Things like cracking your knuckles.

“You’re going to pay for that someday when you get arthritis fingers…”

“I’ll worry about it tomorrow…”

Crack…!.

Eating bowl after bowl of Hersey’s chocolate syrup with 6 scoops of coffee ice-cream drowning somewhere underneath.

“Do you know what you’re doing to your cholesterol...?”

“I’ll worry about it tomorrow…

Noshing on box after box of Oreos, Mallomars and Fig Newtons, just cuz you like em…you’re darn tootin …and on and on and on.

“You’re gonna be so fat someday….”

“I’ll worry about it tomorrow…

When I was a kid I thought I was indestructible. I would bounce instead of break.

I wanted to be a stunt man so I would ride my bike through the park and fall off as if I was shot by invisible enemy agents.

No wall was too high for me to escape my wanna be captors.

I had the secret code that would disarm the dooms day device. I had to get it to the President!

Somebody had to…

There was no baseball, basketball or football too far to dive for… not when there was a world championship at stake.

My motto when playing sports was, “If ya ain’t dirty, you weren’t trying hard enough”.

I even managed to get dirty playing tennis.

I used to fall over the net...a lot.

Somebody had to…

Whatever it was, the consequences didn’t seem to apply at the time.

I’d worry about it tomorrow.

Well, now it’s pretty much tomorrow and while I’m still not all that worried about it, I have to admit that various body parts and joints have been known to rise up and say… “Ah haaaa!” from time to time.

There’re a couple of troublesome discs residing in my spine, both upper and lower regions that have been known on occasion to shout out, ‘Hey, not so fast there ,buddy”.

And my hands have been known to bark at me for about a week after hammering a couple of nails on a weekend…or folding my socks.

My back has been known to seize up on occasion; you know when I’m exerting myself…picking up the newspaper

But for the most part so far so good.

My teeth are still intact…and more importantly still my own. But I need to make a dentist appointment.

Tomorrow….

My cholesterol and blood pressure seem to be okay, but I haven’t seen a doctor to have it checked in about 15 years.

Tomorrow….

I walk 4, sometimes 8 miles a day… unless my knees are sending me nasty postcards reminding me of those 10 foot leaps, not to mention all those pavement pounding miles I accumulated during my 25 years of running.

I should probably see someone about that.

Tomorrow….

But right now I’m off for maybe my final trip to the beach this year before that aforementioned winter freeze sets in. My quickly fading summer skin is in dire need of a tune up.

I know…after 50 plus years of fun in the sun I should probably get a dermatologist to check me out.

And I will….

You know when…