Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Talking About Something Else

So many people, talking and writing about the weather…including me.

I guess cause it’s the winter and there’s not a whole lot else to talk about.

I mean, in the summer, at least I can talk about how hot and sticky it is.

I can also comment about the inappropriate beach attire worn by “some”.

Not that I’m opposed to inappropriate beach attire…I’m not.

It’s more the “by some” wearing it that bothers me.

Not to mention the people that complain about my thong.

Hey, if you can’t take the dazzle, don’t watch the razzle.


You’re asking me?

How would I know?

It’s not like I make this stuff up….

In the spring I can rattle on and on about promise and hope; re-birth and renewal. Baseball beginning anew, gardens hoed and sowed. Seeds sprouting, life affirming…and the need for a really tasty,seasonal spring beer, which, so far, I haven’t been able to find.

So there’s all that.

And fall…well, there’s always a couple of ways to go with fall.

There’s the wistful summer’s end approach; hanging on to summer as long as we can, while ignoring the crusty, dead vegetation wasting in our gardens; the moldy leaves falling on our lawns.

There’s that.

Or there’s the fall loving, leaf peeping, cool, crispy air breathing people angle.

Cozy, comfy fires and warm, wooly sweaters to be donned and possibly darned thing.

I don’t know what that means, either.  It just sounded like it went together. I’m not saying your sweaters have holes in them…even though there’s nothing wrong with that.

A sweater’s a sweater…

And I’m just trying to talk about something…anything…other than the weather…or the winter.

Which shouldn’t be a problem cause there are lot of other things going on.





Let’s see….

I read where some doctor in Italy is going totransplant a human head onto another body, sometimes in the next two years.

So if you’re in the market for a younger, better looking body, hold off on the Slim Fast for a while.  You might be able to just pop your head onto something a few sizes smaller than your current body and save yourself the hassle of making all those shakes.

Of course there are still a few kinks to work out…like walking…and possibly breathing…but you’ll look great.

Personally, if I could scrape together the 13 million or so buckos it’s gonna cost to have the procedure, I would have to make sure that I got a body with pretty good looking feet…because, let’s face it, sounds like you’re gonna spend a lot of time looking at your feet.

Can you imagine if you wake up and the first thing you see is a bunch of hammer toes?

So there’s that, too….

They’ve also narrowed the list of potential Mars colonists down to100 from the initial pool of  200,000 hopele—I mean hopeful applicants. I think the first cut was determined by how many people chose blue as their favorite color. I don’t know what exactly that has to do with your ability to live and thrive on Mars…or even if it’s true or not. I’m just counting on the fact you have no desire to take a one way trip to Mars, and won’t bother to click on the link above to check the facts.

I actually wroteabout all of this a couple of years ago, back when it was first announced. So if you want all the good jokes you’ll have to go back and read it.

The only new news I could discern from this story is that even if you do make the final cut and survive the trip to Mars, you’ll probably only live for 68 days. But of course that’s only by today’s technological standards. By 2024, the year of the trip, it’s presumed future technologies will allow you to survive for at least 70 days, and carry your mobile data usage over from month to month, including free unlimited music downloads, which is important if you live on Mars, since I believe they only have 8 Track technology, with a limited selection.

So there’s that, too…maybe.

I’m sure there are even more topics I could also go on about, other than weather, as well.





Let’s see….

Did I mention about baseball season getting ready to start?

Yeah…I guess I did.

March Madness time is here, if you’re into that type of thing.

If not you can wait for April Apathy….

Let’s see, speaking of blue…or white if you have weird eyes….there’s that whole blue dress/white dress thing.

But that was kind of done to death.

Maybe it should have been nice dress/ugly dress, regardless of the color.

But what do I know about dresses?

It was only that one time…and it was an experiment!

Get over it….

Sorry…just looking for other topics.

And now it’s snowing again.

I guess I’ll start shoveling. Maybe I can get ahead of it…

But I’m not goanna talk about it.

Uh, uh…

Not me….

Not anymore….

Even if it has warmed up to 27….

Nope…not going there…it’s much too slippery a slope….

Not to mention my driveway….

But I’m not talking about the weather…I swear….



  1. And you said awhile back the Winter caused you to have "blog fog" ... wrong again.

    1. The fog is now frozen and cracks are starting to appear....

    2. About the head transplant: Does that mean the transplantee will have two heads? Someone said two are better than one. Probably some poet looking for an iambic pentameter.

    3. Well done Joan, you get today's chuckle muscle award for that. :-)

  2. Well! I enjoyed yet another retort from the Free Lancet. Particularly, I found the fairly complex section on upcoming spare parts to be somewhat heady. You seem to know far too much up to date info on all this and I hear you've been stalking Brad Pitt. Not sure which part you're after, he won't like it if your one of those bit-part players anyway.
    I note your mention of past retorting and it's given me a grand plan of an idea. Mine is likely to be called the ‘High Cost Riposte’ as it is will be a collection of articles written next year but posted in the present time. It will be written on my mobile as I have at last mastered the predictive text feature. I’m hoping it will give me a head start on the latest transplant technologies.


Retort to the Retort -

“Is there anybody alive out there…”