The Freelance Retort: It’s Over!

So as we pull ourselves up and out of the mountain of shredded wrapping paper and bows we woke up under this morning; wipe the crusty remnants of lasagna, ham and turkey from our faces, the only solace we can find, as our heads thump to the rhythm of Frosty the Snowman is...it’s over.

It's over...Christmas is over!

Pull the plug on all that holiday good cheer....

Well, sort of.

The trees remain, with lights and baubles. The streets will continue to glow with mirth and something that rhymes with mirth, if anything does, for at least another week.

The stores will continue to draw large crowds, probably even larger than before the holiday, due to returns and 99% off sales, which means you’ll save about 5 bucks since they were marked up 400% to begin with.

But for the most part…it’s over.

The gift giving, the eating, the drinking...over, over, over.

Did I say it was over?

Christmas Eve was a relatively quiet affair with just Z and I and my mom.

I grilled fillet and Lobster tail to mark the significance of the occasion.

I'm not sure what Z and my mom had because I was on my third viewing of "A Christmas Story," but I'm sure they enjoyed it just as much as I did mine.

So all in all, I have to say, everything went well despite the fact that Z and I do Christmas a little differently than most around here.

See, we decided a long time ago that we both had pretty much everything we could possibly need, including the entire inventory of the LL Bean catalogue…winter, spring summer and fall editions. Therefore, we don't see the necessity for all that gift buying for each other.

Still, we like all the wrapping/unwrapping hoopla of the holiday, so basically we select various household items, wrap them, bow them and put them under the tree.

Last year I gave Z the old dust buster and she gave me the cheese grater. This year I was originally giving her the mix master, but she needed it to bake her cookies, earlier in the week, so I relented and gave it to her early.

It’s important to be flexible with your gift giving.

However, I wanted her to have something to open Christmas morning, so being the perennial elf of good cheer that I am, I gave her the Swiffer wet mop, which I have to tell you, was a bitch to wrap.

I got the TV remote this year, which I was hoping for, because I was getting a little tired of getting up to change the channels the last couple of weeks.

After the traditional exchanging of "gifts" we were off to Z’s brother’s house for dinner; you know, the one I mentioned, a while back, who had that big tree fall through his roof during the August Hurricane. Having a big tree in his living room didn’t work for Thanksgiving, obviously, so he got creative and threw some tinsel and a few lights on the thing, so we we’re good to go for Christmas.

See how things work out, especially this time of the year?

Speaking of which, after the Thanksgiving mix up, Z bought me a shirt with my name and legal familial affiliation embroidered on the pocket, so I was almost able to sit at the main table this time around. Almost...

It’s not that I minded sitting at the smaller kid table…it’s just that I thought it was kind of rude of them, last time, to ask me to leave before dinner…especially since it was my house.

But you know…families….

Our annual Christmas/Winter Solstice shindig was also well received the other night. At least I think it was…I haven’t had a chance to sort through the survey cards yet.

I think we have a pretty good chance of improving on last year’s numbers…mostly because no one caught on fire this year. Well…not if you don’t count the cloaked mystic. But he was only singed.

After some last minute uncertainty over who was possibly bowing out due to illness, or what have you, everyone who was supposed to make an appearance did appear and partied on well after midnight. I think it might have been 12:08 AM to be precise. But I’ll verify the exact time, later, after I scan through the surveillance videos, to determine who took the flat screen TV...again.