Friday, March 23, 2012

Aries Season

So, spring is here....!


I know…I missed it.

Because of…you know…Wednesday.

Actually, it feels like we just skipped spring and went right to summer. 

80 degrees…in March?

Who needs Florida?

Well I guess the Floridians need Florida…or else they wouldn’t have any place to go.

I guess they could go to Alabama, but I’m guessing that would just make for crowded beaches.

So we better just leave Florida where it is.

Don’t mind me…I’m an Aries.

It’s just how we are.

We like to say things like, “Who needs Florida?”…just to stir things up.

And now, aside from spring, it’s the opening days of Aries season.

Kind of like the opening days of baseball season, except we’re not crazy about letting anyone else play with the ball.

It’s just how we are.

Besides, if we did throw you the ball, we would only tell you that you’re throwing the ball back all wrong—if you had it—which you don’t.

But we Aries are also quite generous, thoughtful and considerate, so we would happily let some of you be on our team…as long as we’re the captain…and you’re not.

But don’t be late for practice…cuz we don’t like to be kept waiting. 

Ahhh…the heck with practice, let’s just start playing games…but someone needs to go find another team to play…cuz I didn’t think of it. 

Oh, and bats…we’ll need some of those too…and bases would help…maybe some uniforms.

Hey, I said you could be on my team…I didn’t say I had all the details worked out.

That’s why you’re on the team.


Okay fine….be that way. I never wanted you on the team anyway. 

I just didn’t want to hurt your feelings.

I’m sensitive to those kinds of things…you know?

So now whose feelings end up getting hurt?



Maybe I don’t even want to have a stupid team anyway. Nobody seems to appreciate it.

Or….I could start my own league!

My own league with a whole lot of teams…and I can name the league after myself…and it will be better than any other league there is….and become world famous and make lots of money.

What…you don’t think it could happen?

Well that’s just the kind of thinking that’s keeping you off the team in the first place, isn’t it?.

And don’t think you’re off the hook about getting all those bats and bases…and uniforms.

Right…you’ve probably already forgotten about the uniforms.


It’s not like they’re going to just get themselves are they?

We’re going to need a whole lot more of them for all the new teams in the league…and I’m thinking they should all be blue…because I like blue…. 

Who doesn’t like blue?

And hats…we need hats…but those super cool good hats…not those other stinky hats.

I don’t know who makes them or what they’re called, but you’ll figure it out.

What do you mean you don’t want to be on the team? 

Well that’s a bit selfish of you, isn’t it?

Who’s gonna do all this stuff?

What are you some kind of a Capricorn?

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