Paul Damien, National Geographic
|
A
recent article in National Geographic reported that human heads are getting
bigger.
Great…now I have to replace all my hats again.
The report said that the additional head room is large
enough to accommodate an additional brain the size of a tennis ball.
I guess this is good news because I know of a lot of people
whose primary brain is only the size of a tennis ball to begin with…but most
of them work in hospitals.
But I digress…because my brain is only the size of a golf ball…so I’m easily
distracted.
Actually, I’m a lot more concerned about my left
ear getting bigger than my right ear.
Mostly because it causes my head to tilt at an odd angle,
which makes me look befuddled much of the time.
So where was I?
Oh, right…big heads.
So they’re getting bigger, which doesn’t necessarily
translate into smarter.
They think it could be due to environmental factors.
I mean natural environmental factors, over thousands of
years, not radical shifts in nature due to too many celebrity dance shows.
Apparently back in the day day, our heads weren’t much
bigger than a small monkey’s…or my late Uncle Rudy’s.
Oddly though, he had no trouble tying other people’s shoes.
Anyway, as man evolved and began using his noodle to search
for food sources, shelter and a cable TV company that didn’t charge for Pay Per
View, so did his head size.
Until about 30 thousand years ago when head size leveled
off.
Then about 5 or 6 thousand year ago, when the first
McDonald’s drive-thrus made their appearance, head size began to shrink again.
Coincidentally, that was also around the time that the
comedians Rosanne, Gallagher and Carrot Top came onto the scene and began to
define what is sometimes referred to as the modern comedic error…uh, I mean
era.
Probably because learning how to program a new mobile phone
every two years is enough to make anyone’s head explode.
However, keep in mind that this specific data is based solely on
the study of skulls that were donated by various adults to the few scientific
organizations that deal with this sort of thing.
This leaves me to wonder if these particularly charitable folks
didn’t have a whole lot going on in the head size department to begin with.
I mean who donates their skull to anyone?
How are people supposed to get invited to parties let alone
hold a job without a skull?
Nobody wants to see that.
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Someone grew a pumpkin that weighs a ton.
ReplyDeleteHow odd...you don't usually find overweight pumpkin growers….
DeleteWell, it was mostly because of the size of his head.
ReplyDelete